Miley Cyrus is the product of Satan and Feces.

MILEY CYRUS makes me want to….

a

a) vomit for the rest of forever

b) smile and laugh while i buy her albums and have dance parties

c) drink until i am drunk enough to forget that Miley Cyrus is a person that exists in my reality

I know she is 15 and I know that she has unfortunate teeth but she also has about 7 million dollars and the power to make 3 year olds enjoy wearing  tube tops. This poll is the first step towards getting a unanimous vote that will inevitabley lead to her demise. So come on guys. Let’s extinguish the Hannah Montana Flame before I  get my tubes tied for fear of her influence on my future daughters and flamboyantly gay sons.

make your decision wisely.

A little Item I call: Does anyone know if I’m Dead or Alive?

Hello stranger, I am Dom Delouise.

I had a principle role in the animated feature All Dogs Go to Heaven. Nobody knows if I have ever worked on anything else in my entire life. I clearly have high cholesterol as well as advanced diabetes due to my 700 pound face and body. No man woman or child has heard my name out loud in over 2 decades.

So I pose the question, ” Am I gambling away my last $4 leftover from a lifetime movie I did in 1996 or am I pushing up daisies in a Van Nuys Cemetary?”